Home Alone, Pookie Style

Mwow all you kitty friends out there!  My staff went away for a bit longer than I thought they should a couple days ago.  Oh sure, they left me with plenty of chow and water and toys to stalk, pounce and thrash….but what about my need to ignore them?  Or pester them?  Or taunt them?  How inconsiderate.  Punishment began to occupy my thoughts.  What could I do that would effectively illustrate my displeasure?  Here’s what I came up with.  Fairly complete in my opinion:

• Walk on the counters.  I know I do this anyway when they’re not looking, but it seemed a great place to start.
• Get into ALL of the lower kitchen cupboards.  I used to do this sometimes under the guise of mousie-stalking, until they locked the doors with rubber bands.  They forgot the rubber bands this time–heh, heh, heh!
• Lick something random from the cupboard.  I’ll never tell……
• Chew on forbidden plants.  Yup, those spider plants are a-lookin’ mighty raggedy….
• Hack up a hairball.  Yup, this hairball’s for you!
• Lounge on their pillow cases.  Deposit just enough hair to be irritating in the middle of the night.
• Tip some water out of a water dish.  Slippery, slimy mess, heh, heh, heh!  (Besides, I’ve got a back-up dish in the bathroom sink)
• Chew on toothbrushes.  ‘Nuff said, there–heh, heh, heh!
• Leave toys around in strategic locations.  Eeeek!  what is that furry thing I just stepped on with my bare feet?!  Heh, heh, heh.
• Yowl annoyingly upon their return.  You can’t rub in your displeasure enough.
• Yowl pathetically.  Let ‘em know how mistreated you are…..then ignore their overatures.  Heh, heh, heh.

My Needs are Many: Treat Edition

 

Mwow, my kitty friends!  My staff are what you’d call healthy eaters.  Yup, they’re fans of all things natural and organic.  So, I have been forced to go along with their preferences–my chow, litter and treats are all natural and organic.  I hear ya.  You’re thinking, “Poor Pook.  Being forced to eat cardboard and use more cardboard for his business.”  Well, ya know?!…..not so bad as all that……especially in the treat department!  Staff knows my preference for the birdies and (since there are no treats around in mousie flavor), buy me Whiskas Temptations in chicken flavor!  Check it out:  Here’s a decription from a PetCo site http://www.petco.com/product/105229/Whiskas-Temptations-All-Natural-Chicken-Cat-Treats.aspx

“Whiskas Temptations® All Natural Treats for cats feature natural premium ingredients, a whole grain crunchy shell with a soft meaty center and added vitamins and minerals. Contains no artificial preservatives, flavors or fillers. Resealable package keeps treats fresh and tasty.”

MMMMMMwow crunchy……soft meaty, and boy, I’ll say fresh and tasty!  Two reviewers gave these treats 5 out of 5!  I’m givin’ ‘em 5 mwows out of 5!  They call ‘em Temptations, I just call ‘em yummy and necessary for my very existance!  Send your staff to the store now to pick some of these up in your favorite flavor!

Random Mew-sings

Fall is here….birdies outside the window have changed from the little tiny ones that hover and stick their tongues out at me to the bigger brown ones with red heads and those even bigger ones that play follow the leader and have a feather that sticks straight up on the top of their head….quail, I think the staff call them…..tasty is what I’d call them….colder, so windows are closed so fewer perches for me…Mwow….last night I hid in the part-time staff’s room when he went to bed and closed his door….heh, heh, heh….it was so nice and dark and cozy there at the foot of his bed…..I was feeling quite pleased with my situation and had just dozed off when I heard the rustling of the treats bag…..oh no!  How can I get my treats?!  I jumped against the door and it wouldn’t budge….finally, one of the staff noticed my absence and came looking for me….whew….I need to think ahead and plan things out better!  On a better note, staff must have read my earlier request for new toys and bought me those cool springy-wormy-things!  Mwow, are they fun!  I can drag them all over, and fling them iin the air….the part-timer learned to sort of shoot them across the room for me….fun-fun-fun!

Classic Conquests

Today I’d like to share one of my favorite past conquests.  The part-time staff is highly allergic to me–I know, how can that be possible, as appealing, handsome, and impeccably clean as I am.  Whatever. Anyway, the regular staff decided I should no longer have access to Mr. part-time’s sleeping area, so they purchased a two-level contraption where you can only access the bed part by means of a ladder.  Pretty pleased with themselves they were.  I let them marinate in their smugness for a few days……and then, when no one was looking, I climbed right up that ladder and made a nice napping nest in the boy’s comforter.  Oh the look on their faces when they couldn’t find me anywhere and discovered my conquest of the perch-like bed! Heh, heh, heh.  Now I go up there anytime I feel the need to pester just a bit,… and the door to that room is open.  Never underestimate the Pook!  Mwow!

My needs are many: musings on cooler weather

Mwow, it’s been getting chilly here in the evenings!  This cooler weather has been keeping me on the prowl for warmer napping locales.  I don’t want the staff to think I’ve gone all soft on them and have started to prefer their company, but they do radiate body heat.  So, NOT because they’ve moved up in my world, but because I must have my need for warmth met, I’ve started spending time with them on the couch in the evenings and I’ve started sleeping closer to them at night.  Remember, all you other kitties out there, as long as you are thinking of YOUR needs first, “snuggling” with your staff once in a while is acceptable behavior for someone of your stature and position in life!  Just be sure to maintain your aloofness at all other times, and try not to purr too loudly when “snuggling”–you don’t want your staff to get the wrong idea.

Sharing is a Good Thing

Mwow!  It has been sooooo difficult getting any computer time lately.  I must apologize for my infrequent blogging.   It seems like the staff are always on the desktop, typing and clicking and staring at the screen.  What’s up with that?  One of them is spending increasingly more time on it as the week progresses, blathering on about needing to post homework or comments or something…..whatever!  When she’s not doing that, she’s got her nose in a book and a yellow thing in her hand.  That yellow thing sure looks like a toy to me..she says it’s a highlighter….whatever.  She plays with it, moving it over the book sometimes, and sometimes, she sort of mindlessly taps it on her leg.  But when I want to play with it too, does she let me?!  NO!  How rude!  She sure doesn’t get the sharing thing.  I tried to teach her once: when I’d capture a mousie, I’d bring it to her in bed so she could play with it too.  She didn’t get the sharing thing then, either.  No.  She just got all freaked out and chased me out of the room and I had to stalk and capture the mousie all over again.  Boy, she really tries my patience.  Being the fine cat that I am though, I won’t give up my efforts in teaching her to share.  I will  help her see that sharing the yellow toy with me will make it more fun for both of us.  Wish me luck.  Maybe she’ll even learn to share the computer….yeah….whatever.

Where’s Pookie?!

Mwow!  You know, my staff works pretty hard for me.  (I deserve every bit of their efforts.)  In recognition of all their well-intentioned bumblings, I thought it might be nice (whatever) to provide the top 10 list of places I can be found when they’re worried I might have been shut in a closet.

1.  The closet—duh!  You know I love to be in there.  It’s dark and cozy and might have a mousie or two hiding in there.

2.  Under the bed.  Dark.  Cozy.  Mousie possibilities.

3.  Behind the couch.  My newest hiding place.  Not too dark, but definately cozy with the possibility of a mousie passing by.

4.  Laundry room.  A mousie hot zone, in my opinion.  I used to like to be behind the washer and dryer, but now they’ve ruined THAT, I just lurk on the floor in front of the W&D.  (not nearly as effective….whatever!)

5.  Under the big plant in the living room.  Perfect stalk and pounce location…heh, heh, heh!

6.  Behind the dresser.  See # 5.

7.  On my perch in the kitchen.  Bird watching, duh!  Also a comfy place to nap.

8.  The shower.  Cool place for a nap.  Great place to gather mousie intel.

9.  Under the bedroom window on the magazine shreds….I mean magazine “stack”.  2nd only to the shower on hot days for napping.

10.  In the office.  I love to explore all the little nooks and crannies.  Those 2 spikey plants in there–quite yummy!

So.  Waaaay easier than Where’s Waldo, eh?  I’m off to find a new and secret hiding place.  Heh, heh, heh!

Pushin’ Them Buttons

Heh, heh, heh!  I must congratulate myself on my superior button-pushing abilities:  Mwow!  So, last night, while staff was watching TV and finishing dinner, I got bored.  I decided to “hide” myself waaaaay back in the temporary staff’s closet.  (He’s the one allergic to cats, so I’m continually pestering him–more on that later.)  Anyway,  I get myself waaaay back in there so he could see just enough of me to be annoying, but too far in to be easily captured.  I refused his “commands” to get out, and continued to hold my ground, barely suppressing my laughter.  He decided to get reinforcements and one of the older staff came and snatched me out of there!  Whatever!  She needed to be punished……so I commenced to pushing a few more buttons!  First, I mwowed annoyingly until she shooed me away.  Then, I raced around the house like the wild jungle kitty I am–eyes dilated, tail puffed, jumping up on things I’m “not allowed” to be on.  Then, when she finally succumbed to my enticements and tried to capture me, I ran and twined between her feet, nearly making her fall!  Heh, heh, heh!  I am the master!

Who-da Thunk?

So.  I’ve learned the best laid plans of a jungle kitty often don’t work out as well as was hoped for.  I used to like to take mousies I had captured to a bath tub to play.  Mousie would run and run and run, but couldn’t get away to hide under something!  Cool!  But then, staff found out I was doing this and would come and take mousie away!  Whatever!  I had to come up with a new plan.  My latest plan was to capture mousies and play with them until they got so tired they went to sleep and wouldn’t wake up.  While the mousie slept, I would get a bunch of toys out of my toy basket and place the sleeping mousie in with them so he sorta blended in.  My thought was that staff would NEVER figure this out, and therefore not take be able to take mousie away.  Well, who-da thunk?!  Staff is on to my little trick.  They did find the mousie and now he’s gone.  Mwow.

All is Right With the World

The responsible staff member has returned!  She seemed a bit tired upon her return, and yet still managed to properly fill my chow bowl and give me my treats in a timely fashion.  Really, how hard is it to provide me with sustenance before I can see the bottom of my bowl and enough treats to keep the DT’s away??!  She rarely requires much more than a nudge as a reminder, but him?  Whatever.  It’s so difficult to find good staff; I’m pleased she has obviously decided to remain in my employ.  I am a bit miffed that she has reclaimed her side of the bed, but what can you do?!  The other staff person does amuse me, so in spite of his hit-and-miss attentions to my culinary requirements, I guess I’ll retain him for a bit longer.  I am feeling quite content today, now that the feeding crisis has been resolved.  I think I’ll meditate on this feeling of well being and how I can exploit it to my benefit………..or whatever……..maybe I’ll go for a nap in the shower instead.  Mwow for now!